We'll all have tomorrow off, then we're doing day-sails with Thistle Tuesday and Wednesday." She left him to it and went to talk to Josh. One or two passengers looked at him with ... was it admiration, envy ... or maybe anxiety?Jenni returned as they were passing Heybridge. "Right, Tom. I'd really like to berth under sail, but quite honestly, with the wind we've got I'd have to resort to the anchor to turn in the space available. I, for one, am tired and want to go to bed, so we'll dock under power. We'll brail up the main as we pass Brithnoth, then if you'll go aloft to stow the tops'l, I'd be grateful. When we're moored, I want you to go ashore and walk along to the Queen's Head. There's a yacht there, a ketch, belonging to a friend of mine, moored stern-to. The message is they're invited here for cocoa or whatever."Tom wasn't stupid and realised there was something Jenni was covering up, but... 'if she wanted me to know, she'd tell me'.They turned in the river and moored neatly,. During that quiet time, tears dampening her cheeks, Carson came to realize what Sara had attempted to tell her: The over-riding thing that Jessie Chicago had that Carson didn’t was passion. Jessie had it galore, enough for two people. Carson put the book down. She was doomed to remain an ageing Barbie Doll — good gracious, did Sara really have to say ageing — if she truly lacked passion. Her one hope was perhaps she did have passion but had never learned to release it. Barbie dolls! Carson had never been into them, but her Molly and Susan had been dolls of character. Dolls with passion? No, they were always perfectly behaved. Carson wasn’t sure if she preferred the word bitch or the word mongrel — both were pretty repulsive. But if that’s what it took to drive passion out of her then she’d have to find the switch. One niggle remained — what if she could become something like Jessie Chicago — her friends would probably think she was on drugs. Did that matter? No! Her mom was to be.
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