(control merese bhi nahi ho raha tha)Raj:sorry dear.But pls try to unerstand.Hume ghar bhi jana hy or late ho chuke hy.(Us raat 3 bar muth mari rekha k naam ki.3 peg mare jab neend ayi)Subah me raj ka msg aya k rekha ko bahot maza aya.Me wapis belapur aa gaya.Mein Gujarat janewala hi tha ki kuchh kaam or nikla aya.Or mujhe 3 din k liye pune jana pada.Waha se hum shirdi chale gaye oe pune k friends pune hi ruk gaye.Saturday ko meine raaj ko msg kia k I am still in Mumbai. Usne kaha chinchwad aa sakte ho aaj rat ko?(neki or puchh puchh?)meine kaha same room n same hotel.Sham tak me usi hotel me usi room me pahunch gaya tha.Aaj woh log jaldi anewale the.Room ki bell baji.Door open kar k meine rekha ko khinch liya apni baho me.Raj ne door bandh kia or hum dono bed pe kiss kar rahe the.Kabhi woh upper to kabhi mein.Usne mujhe nanga kia or meine usko.Raj apne aap ho gaya tha.Hum tino ne hi nange beith k antiquity kholo.Rekha mere baju me beithi thi or lund pakde hui thi.Raj dekh raha. Still have a dirty mind I see," she said, grinning."Let me tell you about the first thing. The first thing is to give you my journals. Since ... what happened, and I first saw Jim, I've been keeping a journal. Five or six sentences a day, about my day, my feelings and so on. It's supposed to be a chronicle of my journey of self-understanding. Jesus, that sounds pompous, doesn't it?"I did smile back and nodded. "A bit." Yeah, I thought so too. It's cathartic though. Although hard to maintain every night. Anyway, I've tried my best to do it. There's a lot of stuff in there. Some days I had a lot to say. Ryan, I want you to read them."There was a brief silence. Again, I had no real understanding of why. I was just about to ask it – and it must have been obvious on my face -, when Deanna said, "Why? Because it'll show you where I've been for the past eighteen months. What I've been doing, why, what my feelings are and all the rest of it. It's the best way I can show you how I've been.
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