"Why are you taking that bitch's side against me? I don't know how you can stand to work with her. I hate her."I don't know what made me do it but I went into action immediately. I slipped on a rubber glove and squeezed a drop of DHS 77 out of the plastic bottle onto my finger. Megan was standing right next to me watching me."What are you doing with that?" Megan said."I want to show you something," I said and then wiped the formula from my finger onto Megan's arm. As Megan was slipping into a trance, I looked at Sylvia and said "Bitch face."I told both women to sit down and then I sat down with Megan and leaned close to her ear so that Sylvia would not hear what I was saying."Can you hear me, Megan?" Yes."After her positive response, I gave Megan the key phrase 'bourbon sour' and then proceeded to give her the instructions I wanted her to follow. When I was finished with Megan, I went over to Sylvia and gave her instructions.For a moment, I wondered if I was going too far but the. I was serious about dating and foolishly honest about it. I got quite a reputation with the ladies. They didn't need The Rules to make long-term plans for me, which never included sex before the third or fourth date. Trouble was, I never seemed to get that far. You aren't so selective when all you want is to get laid. As they say in the computer biz, all women are "plug-compatible". I was looking for something more and got much less.Fifth, we couldn't do anything at "my place". It was a mess. No woman would be horny enough to put up with my bedroom. I did remember how to make a bed but don't remember ever making one. I had one set of sheets, cheap, permanent press and (I kid you not) an ugly brown plaid. At least they were durable; they lasted until the day after I got married.I'd throw my dirty clothes in the closet until I ran out of clean ones. When I was done with my laundry I'd spread it on my bed, usually because I didn't have enough quarters for the dryer. When I went to bed.
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