Moral of the story: "Hard work is never appreciated."the Five Rules to Remember in Life1. Money cannot buy happiness, but it's more comfortable to cry in a Corvette than on a bicycle.2. Forgive your enemy, but remember the ass-hole's name.3. If you help someone when they're in trouble, they will remember you when they're in trouble again.4. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.5. Alcohol does not solve any problems, but then neither does milk.AND A BONUS RULE:6. Condoms do not guarantee safe sex;A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband!This one is compliments of johnRamblings of a Retired MindI found this timely, because today I was in a store that sells sunglasses, and only sunglasses. A young lady walks over to me and asks, "What brings you in today?"I looked at her, and said, "I'm interested in buying a refrigerator." She didn't quite know how to respond.Am I getting to be that age?I was thinking about how a status symbol of. This was way better than I expected.With all the girls targeting me, Mike surprised me by being the first person in my face.“Okay, what the hell is going on?” he asked.“What?” I asked innocently.“Who are you and what have you done with Jeff?”“Jeff has left the building,” I said.“Seriously. What gives?”“I’ve been taking a course on confidence. Everyone’s always saying I lack it.”He nodded, although he wasn’t completely buying into it.“What course? Where?”“Well, nothing formal. I’ve been downloading shit, and reading books, practicing in video chat rooms.”“The last time we came here-”“Was six weeks ago. A lot can change in that time.”“I’ll say. I’d almost say you could teach me.”I chuckled. “Yeah. Like you’ve ever had trouble picking up.”“I know, but they all but ignored me for you. That’s…”“Wait. You’re not upset that they turned you down. You’re upset that they turned you down for me! What the fuck, dude?”“Sorry, man. I know that sounds wrong.”“That’s because it is wrong. Don’t get.
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