Are you up for it." It's a bit soon. I still don't know if I can pull it off. Anyway, thereare probably loads of other girls going for the job." I like the way you said "other" girls. Does that mean you are acceptingthat you are a girl now?" It was only a slip of the tongue. Anyway. I've only just started eventhinking about this. Don't push me to soon. Anyway, if I don't get thisjob, I can go back to being Tony again." Is that what you want?" I DON'T KNOW!" Shhh, don't shout. The last thing you want is to draw attention toyourself." Sorry. It's just that I keep having to remember who I am underneath thisgirly exterior. I don't want to loose my past." You will never loose your past. You are just looking after your future."I felt myself tearing up.Sheila leaned across and held my hand."Look Toni, its about time I say things that might upset you. Don't shoutor be angry. OK?"I nodded, apprehensive at what she might say. I looked around. Luckily,the restaurant was not full and as we were. Lonely. You want companionship again, and not just the platonic kind. You're craving another romantic relationship. However, these thoughts just drive you to feel guilty for wanting another relationship so soon after your girlfriend's passing.She was such a handful when she was alive. So... insatiable. She loved life and lived it to the fullest. She always seemed to be happy and always tried to make sure the people around her were happy, too. With you, doubly so. She made sure you never wanted for anything, especially in the bedroom. She was always experimental and tried to follow your whims.You smile at the memory of her, then frown again and heave a sigh. It's going to be really hard finding anyone who was quite like her.As you turn to leave the cemetery, a chill runs up your spin. You feel as if eyes are on you. You stop and look around. There's a couple of other people here but none of them seem to be watching you. Nevertheless, you can't shake the feeling that you're not.
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