"Nervous." Don't feel that way, you'll be fine." That's what everyone keeps telling me." Everything will be fine," Nurse Jennings said with a slight grin."Almost everything. I mean but for that big guy down there."'Yes, big guy will be gone all right.' Tom thought to himself. He feltlike a man knowing he was about to be castrated."You don't look like you have cancer?" I don't." Can you tell me why you're doing this?"Tom laughed for a second. "Would you believe I have over two hundredunpaid parking tickets?"Nurse Jennings laughed very loudly. "No I wouldn't. I think I get theanswer now, you can't tell me." No I can't." I was in your spot about two years ago," Nurse Jennings beganexplaining. "Back then I was twenty-five years old and had advancedtesticular cancer. The doctors had given me only a few months to live."Tom was surprised by the nurse's revelation. The woman apparently wastrying to cheer Tom up."One day over at NCI a doctor told me about this program and asked if Iwanted to. In Bihar, at present returning from relatives in Kolkata. We were talking in whispers like young lovers but formally. But slowly we started talking more frankly and she told me of her early marriage, her unexciting life, her dull husband, dull not simply in a physical sense. She had an M.Sc. degree but what was the use of it? She was not complaining, not blaming, but just being frank. And was a bit sad. She was not a woman who falls for anyone impulsively, even if she let me do all that in the toilet. You know what I mean. I felt nice that she trusted me. I could listen to her the whole night. Or maybe the whole life. I was thinking. Then she put her hand on mine and closed her eyes. With my free hand, the right hand, I touched her face, her eyes, removed a lock of hair from her face. She said nothing. She wasn’t asleep. The compartment was almost dark. I extended my hand and placed it on her breast. She took it in my hand and pressed it on her breast. I bent over her and she pulled.
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