"Carol had set me up to be stuck in panties for the rest of the week. Nowshe was angling to get me into pantyhose. Was it male or female intuitionthat told me she knew that I was a woman trapped in a man's body and thatI knew that she wanted to keep me there and thought that by trapping me inpanties I would not discover who I really was? So I made a bet."I bet I won't see 35 women in skirts wearing opaque black pantyhose onthe way to work," I said. "If you win I will have to buy a month's supplyof pretty polly black opaque pantyhose but if I win I get to take off mypanties." Done," she said. Why had she agreed so quickly? Did she think I wouldwin and rediscover my male identity? Or did she think I would lose andwearing pantyhose would help me to rediscover my male identity? In factwhy had I made the bet? Was I really a woman trapped in a man's body or aman who really should not be wearing panties in the first place? Therewas some kind of trick she had played on me to get me. Scrappy jumped and pawed, whining at my knees the whole way. Like me, I believe he was trying hard to comprehend why only moments ago, little September Snow, who’d been running along side him free as the wind, now lay silent in my arms. # I buried her in the back yard at home. Marking the tiny grave with a small wooden cross nailed together in the garage, the old man’s words played over in my head as I worked. ‘Tough luck son…sometimes miracles happen.’ Sure they do. It would have been a miracle had I not lost control of my dogs. If only I’d been paying more attention instead of struggling with that stupid bag of groceries, my innocent puppy would be alive, instead of buried beneath the frozen yard. Her death was my fault and I hated myself for it. After begging her forgiveness, I threw the shovel in the shed and went in. If only there was some way to go back in time, if only I could relive the moment before they’d slipped out of my hand…maybe I could have changed everything. But.
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