” I thanked her for the information and she retreated back into herself. The Stars were the home team and elected to go first. Their first skater approached the puck and got it moving with his stick, skating in a way that looked almost leisurely toward the Flames’ goal. The goaltender came out of what I now knew was the ‘crease.’ The skater continued to approach and at the last moment faked one way and went the other, and for the first time that game a puck hit the net. Sandrine jumped up screaming in the otherwise silent room. “Oh, man! Did you see that? Deked him right out of his fucking jock strap! Beautiful! Just fucking beautiful!” I thought she might start digging at Danielle, but she sat down without doing so. The Flames’ first player was just picking up the puck on his way to the net. Rather than trying to get very close, he took a shot from just inside the blue line, hoping to catch the goaltender off guard as he came out of the crease, but the goalie smothered the shot.. It was simply not there one fine day. We lost everything. In one sudden incident our world was cruelly morphed into this… this place I wouldn’t wish on any person in this world. That devastation is too hard to handle Brian. I simply cannot take it another time. I’m afraid of loving you. I’m afraid of being happy. I’m afraid that it will be taken away from me and I will again become the automaton I was during those first few months after…’ she broke off as her voice choked and she turned towards Brian, curling against his chest. As he cuddled her against him, Brian was too overcome with emotion to speak. He knew the way Andrea was thinking was wrong. To hear someone he loved speak that way, give up all hope and let life pass by, it was too distressing. Life was not something you could sit and watch from afar while it finished. It touched you with its joys and sorrows. It involved you into it, however much you wanted to remain detached. It never let you get away, not until death came.
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