The stalls, the weird couch at the far end, thetampon dispensers, the coral pink tile (the Boys' room was done in blue),the lack of urinals."So you're in the girls' bathroom again? Interesting."But I didn't say anything!"Yes, you did. Your body is speaking your train of thought right now. Iknow everything, you can't hide anything from me."Shit. Shitshitshit. How was I going to get out of this one? I had alwaysbeen able to lie my way out of punishment, now here I was spilling mythoughts out to this woman, who could with a stroke of her pen send me toprison."I want you to know I am here to help you. My job isn't to get you introuble, but to keep you out of it. I won't make any recommendations oneway or the other until we've seen each other several times. Now, why doyou think you are in the bathroom?"I had to pee, I realized. Made sense. But this was the girls' bathroom,and I was a guy! I tried to leave the room, so I could use the moreappropriate facilities--and walked right back into. She did propose introducing me to some of her husbands’ single men friends but I was awkward among men and made excuses.By this time, I had switched jobs to a local office and hardly spoke to any of the men there on subjects not to do with work. I later found out that my office nick-name was ‘The Ice Maiden’, if only they had known about the volcano inside me! One of the office juniors did once say that he really fancied an ‘Artic Roll’ and everyone laughed and looked at me, I was puzzled and a bit upset then, but now I know why he said that it makes me smile, he was an attractive lad.My friend was a keen gardener and her garden was immaculate whereas my garden was a jungle, so it would be a regular thing that we would spend a day together when she would tidy my hair and then tidy my garden, chatting and giggling all the time with tea and cakes on the patch I called my lawn, weather permitting. Of course, the conversation turned to her sex life and my lack of a sex life and she.
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