I couldn’t think. I couldn’t move. My own little girl was on stage, half naked and about to have sex with another girl. My mind exploded with a thousand thoughts all at once. How long has she been doing this? Is she a lesbian? Is she hurting for money? Does she like doing this? How the hell do I get out of here with attracting her attention? The room was mostly shadows but it was small and if I stood up she surely would see me. Plus there were some lights on the surrounding walls and the stage lights illuminated the audience a bit too. What if she sees me? Holyfuckingoddamshit! All she had to do was scan the crowd and I’d be spotted. I got my mind to settle down a little and looked up at the stage. They were sitting in the middle of the bed, facing each other, making out and undressing. By the way her tongue was sliding into Dorian’s mouth it was clear she was having a good ol’ time. I was trapped! Soon they were both naked and Dorian was laying on top of “Jade” with her mouth on. My hands came up, cupping my mouth and nose, my fingertips stopping short at my eyes. I tried to regain composure to talk to him. ‘How old were they…’ ‘He was three. She was twenty nine.’ I strained the words out, almost between my teeth, they were painful to speak. ‘Young. Too young to die. I can’t say any words that will magically fix things. That never happens. It’s not like a tv show where someone dies one week then the next shit moves on. Things will be fucked up for ages. And they don’t get ‘better’. They get ‘different’, they get ‘tolerable’ I suppose would be a better word to use.’ Roger finished speaking, looking at me. He opened his mouth again, his eyes fallen, sympathy behind every word, ‘It sounds harsh I know, and it sounds like a bastard of a thing to say, but it’s the truth. You’ll never forget them, you’ll never lose them from your heart, and one day, you’ll be with them again. But you damn well make sure you join them under your terms, not under someone else’s.’ I.
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