"Did you orgasm?" she asked."I don't know." You didn't. You would know if you had," she said, smiling affectionately."I would have if he hadn't finished so soon," I said, hoping it would be different with Phillip. "We'll have oral sex first next time." That's a good idea," Phyllis said.I didn't tell her the 'next time' would be with Phillip. He had called early that morning to say he would see me that night. "Danny's going to be with Julia," he said, confirming that we were following our practice of rotating partners to please my mother.My Mom never talked about the new me. She did, however, put new slip covers on the downstairs couch cushions. This, I took as a sign that she would permit me to take the guys downstairs, but not to even consider taking them upstairs to my bedroom.If I thought anyone else would ever see this I would skip the night with Phillip. The thought of my boyfriend reading about that night sends chills up and down my spine. But, since my journal is for my eyes. I opened up the internet browser and it resumed Ana's last session. It did not shock me that it was a porn site because my wife used to watch it during her boring trips out of town. But what was surprising to me, was that the video was about black older men fucking younger white women. I was confused because Ana had never mentioned anything about old black men’s fantasy. Now I was curious so I looked inside her suitcase and found a very huge black dildo; one that I had never seen before. When Ana came home I mentioned the porn site with black guys on her computer along with the black dildo. She had a little blush; but then she told me she just got the dildo before her trip. She started having this fantasy lately, so she experimented with that huge dildo on her trip. And she added that older black men turned on her much more than younger studs…After dinner Ana asked me if I wanted to have some fun. I told her that I was too tired and stressed to fuck her as she deserved…Then Ana told.
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