If things do not turn out fine — the soul, in the form of a ghost, will cause troubles to those loved ones.I am in that position. After 14 years of marriage I must confess to you about things I did that you knew nothing about and never suspected, as your love for me was without conditions and with total belief.You see, my darling, my physical (sexual) needs were much higher than what you gave me. I am not saying our love making was bad or that I did not enjoy it. It only was not enough.You always "made love" to me slowly and gently, and always gave me the best orgasms — but many times I just needed to be "fucked hard". You know the difference. While I tried to hint at this need many times — you insisted that "making love" was the best way of showing love.So, even before we got married I had to make a choice. Leave you and seek what I physically needed — or marry you and lead a double life.I chose the later option because I loved you too much to lose you. This love is as strong today. Colleen and I will finish up with Jack. You stay here and get yourself under control."They left me alone, which allowed me to show some emotion. I'm not sure which was more profound, the unresolved violence in my heart, or the sadness as I thought about Beth Ann. The one thing I was sure about was that Mr. Bell was a genius. He knew exactly what I was going through and acted perfectly to help me deal with it.I went somewhere in my head because the next thing I knew Colleen had her arms around me, and was softly talking. "Baby, I know it hurts. I know how badly it hurts. It hurt us that bad when you died and we got through it. You'll get through it too." She was far more worried about me than I was, so I kissed her to let he know I was listening and we went home.Benjamin met me at the door, as he always does when I arrive home, and seemed to know I was upset. He looked around for someone to growl at, but seeing no one, opted to stick by me all evening. Colleen filled Rebecca in on our.
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