"You wouldn't have a drop of poteen on the premises, would you? My throat is terrible parched, and I don't think I can go into all the details without a drop or two to loosen up the vocal machinery." I'm sorry," Patrick said. "Maeve doesn't drink, so we don't keep alcohol in the house." Not a drop?" Cornelius said. "I'm stranded among teetotalers, you say? Faith, it's a terrible prospect for a man like me." Sorry," Patrick said. "Now, can you please tell me how someone like yourself ended up in that lamp?" Well," Cornelius said. "I'm one of the little folk, fairies as you generally call us, and I was minding me own business some time ago -- I suppose it would be 800 or so of your own years -- when I took it in mind to see a bit of the world. I stowed away on a ship bound for Palestine, during that little disturbance you had called the Crusades, and in no time at all I found meself in the middle of a disagreement about some gold that was stolen from a wizard in Syria." Oh?" Patrick. At least, that is what I perceived at the time.I wasn't sure whether it was true or not, so just to be on the safe side besides burning the candle every night, I also did more stuff around the house. Which I think also helped since Mom became more touchy and her clothes a little more revealing when my father wasn't present.Then came the Saturday Dad told Mom he was going golfing with some buddies from work. I could tell Mom was bummed and heard her say how he promised to take her to see the new romantic movie showing at the local theater.Quickly I interrupted and said, "Hey, Mom, I'll go with you."Dad looked puzzled with my response but said he'd even pay.Mom looked at me and replied, "Now why would my son want to spend a Saturday in a theater with his old mother and watch a movie he didn't really want to see." I don't mind, honest Mom. Besides, I don't have anything else planned."Mom smiled and palmed my cheek before saying, "I'll go get myself ready," and then she walked away.Dad.
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