"Like I said, Paige uses the word penis, never cock or dick. So when she said, "This isn't about cock size, this is about love" she caught my attention."What I have been doing is wrong, but I can't help it. I'm addicted to Alan's cock. I'm so addicted that I do almost everything he tells me to do just so I can keep him fucking me. But I don't love Alan - he is an obnoxious asshole and except for when he's fucking me I can barely stand him. I love you and I've never loved anyone else but you. I love being married to you and I love the way you love me and if all possible I want to find some way to hang onto it. I'm not stupid; I know that what I've done has hurt you, but I'm hoping that you loved me enough to at least try and see if we can't work something out that will keep us together." You going to stop seeing him?" No." Then I don't see what we have to talk about." We have to talk about us, not about him." You've spent twenty-five years with me and you don't know me well enough by. Alright then, at least it's decided. I'll do a basic screen just so Ican fill in the reasons for restraint and recommendation.Where to start?I run through all the negative features of depression and we tick themall really. Not eating, not sleeping, weight loss, rumination, thoughtsof worthlessness, blah, blah, blah. Boring.Let's try something a bit more fun. How about insight?"Mr Moore. Do you ever think that what you have just told me, aboutsupernatural beings and gender swaps, might seem strange to otherpeople. And they might not believe you?" Well of course they don't believe me. No-one does. Because no onebelieves such things are possible. I didn't until he showed up and didthis to me. And the person I was has been erased from reality so there'sno chance I can ever prove it." In knowing that, then why tell us? You know we won't believe you andwe'll lock you up." I know that. But I don't care any more. Of course I'd kept it secret.But it's horrible. I can't live as a man. Not like.
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