I told you, I reduced her to tears, and I still kept going. But whilst she was all raw emotion, I suddenly asked her if she still loved you. She had tears running down her face from me shouting at her, but she said, 'More than you can ever imagine', but that you were never to know. You had every reason to hate her and probably did. That you had your own life now, and she had no right to interfere. That you must never know. She made me promise never to tell you. She did admit that she had thought about it, that she'd beg you to take her back, now that you were back in Bristol, but after the Easter Monday episode she'd decided against it. It was her fault she'd lost you through her own mistakes, and she could never have you back." So what happened?" Well she was far too upset for me to launch an attack on her mother. So I left and came to see you. To beg you to go and see her." He tried to smile, "But you were as scared as she was. That's why your mother and I cooked up yesterday's. I couldn’t even hate her. She’d had no intention of doing that at all. It had just happened. A night of a little fun between one woman somewhat inclined to be gay, Barbara, who nevertheless had enjoyed a couple of heterosexual relationships, and one woman determinedly heterosexual, Stacey, who might even have been a touch homophobic, had laid the foundations of what might as well have been one of the great loves of our times. No one had tried for it, no one had expected it, no one really wanted it, and no one could do anything about it. Apart from the sexual side of it, I wasn’t even shut out of the love we all shared. I’d never heard of a relationship developing in that way, and neither had the others. Barbara had been terribly apologetic. She had been the catalyst, I suppose you could call it, for a change that might have ruined my marriage. On the other hand, she was too nice a woman to blame for something that just struck out of the blue. I suppose I could have hated her. It.
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