As we broke apart, I opened my eyes to see something changed in her, and she turned away quickly. “What’s wrong? What did I do?” “Nothing, it’s not you.” “Then what is it?” I pulled her back around, staring into those blue pools framed by her dirty blonde streaks of hair that fell into her eyes. “I don’t know, I just can’t remember feeling like this before. It scares me, you scare me. Not like that, not in a bad way, but…” “But what? Tell me.” “But, it’s like I want to let go, of the hurt and the hard times, and just enjoy this moment, which has been so perfect, like a dream! But if I do, when it’s over, all of this will come rushing back, and that will hurt worse then not letting go. It’s like I can see life without the pain, but I don’t want to visit it and have to come back to reality. Does that make sense?” “Yeah, I get it, but at the same time, you can’t deny you feel something too. What does that mean then?” She paused, looking at my eyes, and it felt like she was searching my. .. I was in the Park with you. We were hiking, and then... What happened?" I remember you making me the tea. I don't remember drinking it." You don't? I do. You said you liked it. Said it was a little bit smoky, a little bit sweet, a little bit like licorice. I thought that was a good description. I remember being glad you were enjoying it..." Yes! Now I remember! Curious, it's like remembering a dream. It might be totally forgotten, but if you make a note about it when you first wake, the note can help you remember later. It's as if you've lost the mental pointer to the memory, and the note helps you to find the memory..." A few minutes later we finished our picnic lunch and started our return hike. I remember seeing a dog coming toward us, running free. I think I turned to point the dog out to you Becky, and then... Then... Then what? I have a dim memory of a vibration. My feet vibrating. Not like an earthquake, much faster, like standing on a tuning fork. And then... Nothing....
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