I feel like a freak that really doesn't fit in anywhere. What am I? I don't know what I am anymore." I stopped talking and started thinking lost in my own world. I thought I was mature and a good brother and son. I thought I was a male! Now I am being told by those I love and their friends I am androgynous. I could be either with little effort! The worst thing for me to deal with right then was the fact that I was being asked to look like a girl! Everybody here I knew thought that I could and should do this thing. WHY? What was so important about this to make me feel so bad about myself? I was so hurt and confused I started to cry then. The tears just poured out of me. I was being hugged and petted. I heard sounds but I could not make them out. I started to calm down enough to just sob and that is when I felt a cool damp cloth being drawn softly against my eyes and face. I looked up and my Aunt handed me another drink and told me to just sip it this time. I did several times. My. ”“I’m not going to,” she said. “You don’t pass me around. I’m not an effin’ whore.”“You’re not a whore. I know that. Not even close. And I don’t pass you around. We’ve been married forty-five years and I’ve never wanted anything from you except you being faithful. You’ve done that. Now I want you to fuck another man for me.”“Not going to happen,” she said. She had a determined look in her eye. “You can get that effin’ thought out of your head right now, mister.” That’s when she rolled out of bed, pulled her robe over her head, and zipped it closed. “I’m sixty-four. What’s wrong with you?” It was her way of closing herself off to me.“There’s nothing wrong with me,” I said. “This is what I want.”She went silent. We didn’t speak the rest of the night. Or the next morning either. But we talked about normal things soon enough. Two weeks later we had sex again. We used toys.After her orgasm, I said again, “I want you to fuck another man for me. One that you like, I’m not saying you’ll do.
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