She was very sad, asking me if it had been cancer. I told her yes. It was just a little white lie to make her feel better. I made it seem as though I was buying that dress to help me deal with it, like it was therapy. Her eyes were sympathetic and the lady hugged me, giving me 25% off the E730.00 price tag."What the ... fuck?" My boyfriend was pale and his eyes were wide open."How do you like it, Mark?" I smiled and put my hands on my hips."Why?" he asked."I told you, I didn't like my tits," I shrugged."But I thought, I ... Why didn't you get bigger ones?" He looked ready to cry."Why would I do that?" I was starting to get angry, actually, realizing that my boyfriend liked my tits more than he liked me.We both looked down at my chest."I thought you'd be happy for me," I looked at him. "For us." Well, baby ... I'm not." He turned around and left.My father was there, just around the corner and I ran to him, hugging him as I started to cry. He stroked my hair and kissed the top of my. I didn't knock or use the doorbell. I used my key and entered. I had a compulsion that came over me. It asserted control. It was irresistible. I wanted to know what was going on. I wanted to know what my darling, my soul mate, was doing when I was not around. This was when I made the bad decision. This was when the relationship spun out of my control. This is when the final spin occurred. I slipped the key in the lock. I turned it smoothly and opened the door. Immediately I could smell the odor of sex permeating the apartment. Ursula's master bedroom was to the left, past the beautiful art pieces and the filled bookshelves. Sounds were coming from that direction. Sounds I had heard before. Sounds I had made or caused her to make. Very fucking disturbing sounds. You understand? Am I fucking clear? Then I heard the voice that killed my dreams, that murdered my hopes, that destroyed my life. I heard Carl. And he was giving orders! His voice was commanding my darling, my heart, my.
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