She was the girl that one lays in bed crying, thinking about what they would do to even hold her hand. I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. I watched every graceful movement that hypnotized me into a trance I never wanted broken. She had the posture of a queen, and the face carved by angels. Everything I had ever wanted slipped away into a starry floating dream that was this girl. The flight was called and I watched her get up and I made sure I was far enough behind her in the line that I could still see her, but not close enough so that she would recognize me. Everything that was worrying me before about the airport seemed to disappear and I went smoothly through the line, and before I knew it I was on the plane, standing beside my seat. To my dismay she was 2 rows behind me so I wouldn’t get to see her the entire flight, unless I faked going to the bathroom. I then reflected that I may not need to fake it, with the 11 hour flight ahead of me. Everything then happened as usual. I. I found the tears gave me great release and, after a hug from my 'mother' - it was so nice having a loving mother again, my real mother had passed on twelve years ago - I felt ready to start thinking about what the future might hold for me as Janice McCall.The enforced period at 'home' allowed me to learn how to live my life as a woman and I needed the time that being without work gave me to adapt to a world that was surprisingly different. I found out that I had no feminine instincts, muscle memory, or anything else from the original Janice McCall to help me adapt - I was still Edward Sangster inside but, this time around, I was in a teenage girls body. I had no clothes sense but Janice had possessed enough clothes to allow me to experiment and by shopping with her friends, I managed to get by eventually. The same went for make-up. I avoided it at first until that brought about too many comments from both friends and family as they started to lose patience with me, telling me to.
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