Suddenly you see yourself not as the sexily attractive woman you dressed up to be, but, as everyone else sees your - a man dressed up in women’s clothes, who has just been used as a sexual plaything by another man. You contrast this with the cognitive self-image you have created for yourself. You feel repulsed by what you have just done; by how you look. You see yourself as a sissy; a faggot! You run from the bar through the street still crowded with vanilla partygoers. You are overcome with self-consciousness; your face and your clothes still visibly coverd in a mans cum; you, an obvious man in womens clothing; your own cum starting to dribble from your crotch down you stockinged legs. You run as fast as you can in your heels to your car and drive homes quickly as you can. You lie awake all night thinking about it; trying to rationalise what happened. You convince yourself that your feeling of revulsion confirms that you are not gay. Maybe this event will help you stop. " Yeah, that's what I think" he said as he moved closer, "After seeingyou at school all week, we all think that you'll always be a girl,even after this five year deal is over. Haven't you noticed that eventhe kids that aren't really cool with this aren't giving you a hardtime? That because of the way you look and have acted so far! And ifyou look this good now, what'll happen after five years? Hell, halfthe kids in school didn't even read you as a one of the guys tryingfor that scholarship! They assumed that you were just a hot new babethat joined our school!" But I..." No buts Beth. Stan, me, Janet and Marcie all figure that you'll nevergo back to being a guy because it's obvious that you like being a girlto much for that, so why not just give it up and be the girl that youwant to be?" Just what do you mean Bill?" I mean, why don't you and I go to a show tonight? Maybe we can cruisethe strip tomorrow night. That's what I mean."I was so shocked that I couldn't say anything right away,.
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