Two days later: it was Friday night and I had told my mother I was going to a friends house and would be spending the weekend as a bonding experience. It was not lie as such I was going to be spending the weekend with a friend except that friend was Nurse Kate and the bonding was going to be sex related activities. I spent two hours looking for the right thing to wear and packed a bag even though I didnt think I would need anything that was in it. I ran down the stairs shouting my good byes as I threw myself out the door and to the end of the road where Nurse Kate was waiting for me in her car. I opened the door and jumped in landing head first into her lap she smiled you know you are going to do yourself another injury if you keep doing that I looked at her with a huge smile on my face sorry&hellip,. Nurse Kate she rolled her eyes lifted my head and kissed me softly on the lips do you not think we are a little beyond the nurse formalities please baby dont be so formal at least when. ”“How’d you let that man go if you felt that way? Say more.”“I had to focus on what I needed to keep and what I needed to let go of in my life, and it wasn’t the men; it was the underlying set of rules about relationships that I’d been raised with and the love I felt for them. As it turned out I had some stored-up anger and resentment at David, and at myself. Much of that stemmed from the way I was raised and my church upbringing. We’d been co-enablers of that paradigm our whole time together. I realized I had been treated as a chattel unworthy of making it on my own. My father ‘gave me away’ at my wedding to David; what the fuck do you think that symbolizes; certainly not the start of an egalitarian relationship. David and I went to the same church for years, and I received continuous messages to ‘obey’ and ‘support the man of the house’ and so on. David was fat, dumb, and happy, and doing what was expected of him by the church, our parents, and by me. He took care of HIS little.
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