I had nothing clean to put on. I emptied out thehamper and put in a load of wash. While the machine was "cooking", Idonned my dirty clothes and made my way to Belle's Bakery. I'd beenspending money lately like they were going to stop printing it soon. Thestore was relatively empty this early in the day. Belle herself waited onme and as I gave her my order, she stared at me curiously.I could tell that she didn't recognize me, but the tone of my voice andmy standard order of a small cheesecake and some donuts put her mind inoverdrive. I wasn't in the mood to explain things to her. As I left thestore with my packages, she continued staring at me with a quizzical lookglued to her face. I'm not sure why, but it made me smile. I actuallyfound myself whistling on the way home. I began to unconsciously swingthe boxes of goodies to and fro. I caught myself before I did any damageto the contents.What was I going to do about Sam? What were these strange feelings I washaving for Fred? I felt. It just says I feel more safe and sound in your arms than I do anywhere else on this earth.”“What about your Grandfather?”“There’s a security in your arms that’s far deeper than he can give me. He can try to protect me physically, but you’re also able to operate at other levels, sexual and emotional levels, he can’t. He can love me as a grandfather or parent, but you love and cherish me as a husband and lover.”Ignoring the lover comment, for the moment, Hawk replied, “You do realize I’m just learning what love is. I barely remember my mother. I now realize my father loved me - in his own way. The problem is it wasn’t demonstrated in a physical or emotional manner. I thought I was in love with my ex-wife, but look at the betrayal I received there. I honestly think if it hadn’t been for ‘Jumbo, ‘ I’d never have had any idea what love was.”“Who is Jumbo?”“He was my friend in prison. He died trying to protect me. In his dying I started to understand love. Your and Brenda’s responses when.
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