Despite my need to hold you, love you and nurture you, I know that it is not a good thing if I do it. You will need a constant, unchanging hand to guide you through your life. As badly as I long for this, I know it can not be. I can not ask for your forgiveness, only for your understanding that I did what I thought was best for you. I treated your father badly for the last 2 years we were together. As I look back at the things I did to him, I now understand why he shut me out of his life. I tried to reduce him to less than a man. I threatened to have a baby by someone else. By all appearances it looked as if I had begun to follow through with my threats. Until you were born even I was not absolutely sure who your father was. One look told me. The man I left with that evening was not a good person. I only wanted to frighten your father and get him to agree to another approach to becoming pregnant. I was angry, not really at him, it was not his fault. I took out all my frustration. . very well, you may come as well.' Shaking his head and sighing softly, Richard followed after the woman with Lillin in tow. She walked two feet behind him and never said a word. He could feel her eyes on his back and he felt a little like a caged animal being put on display. She had been acting weird all morning and she hadn't so much as left him alone for more than five minutes; it was as if she was afraid he was going to just disappear if she took her eyes off him. Did she think he was dangerous or something? He just really wished she would say something, because this near silent treatment was really starting to get on his nerves. Perhaps she was mad about him rushing off into the fight last night, after she had told him not to go. That was really the only thing he could think of that would explain this behavior. They were led down to the main floor and through a series of beautiful hallways until they finally came to one that was long and only had one massive set of double doors.
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