I stopped drinking when my head began to buzz a little bit. Back at our rooms, I told her good night, she smiled and thanked me for showing her a good time like we had been on a date or something. Inside, I realized the side door was still open. I looked up and saw she was looking my way, so I told her good night and reached to shut the door. ‘Just knock if you need anything at all.’ She told me. I nodded and closed the door. Then I undressed and went to bed, sleeping like I had not done in ages. On other trips I might have gone back down to the bar to see if there was any action, but for some reason I didn’t want to. +++ I woke up to a knock on the door. It was obviously morning. I tugged on my robe and answered it. ‘Wow!’ Was my instant reaction. Henrietta had on a pretty light beige dress, it had patterns on it that somehow seemed to hide her figure, made her appear slimmer. It struck me that she didn’t look really fat, rather she looked big, and solid. The top of the dress was. Why was he telling me this? What did he know about me I didn’t know he knew? This was about him more than twenty years ago. Why talk about it now? What did he want me to say? Could I just disappear from here in a puff of smoke?He said, “Is there anything you want to ask?”I felt trapped, and instead of just saying “No,” I felt I had to say something more substantial.I said, “But that was long time ago, when you were young.”He smiled slightly and said, “Yeah, that’s when it started, but that isn’t saying it stopped then. I mean, opportunities arrived, off and on, over the years. It’s called man-sex. I’m taking about sexual relief and sexual satisfaction, not romance. If you want romance, I’m not your guy. You’d have to find another gay guy.”Again we sat silently – then he stood up and said, “I just wanted to put that out there, between us, man to man. Think about it, that’s all.”He turned and went down the hall to their room.The next several days my mind was in turmoil. I had trouble.
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