MR. G I am a businessman, first and foremost. Let's clear that up right away. I am sure there are those who call me a monster; an inhuman sadistic megalomaniacbent on using any method to achieve my goals of endless power and wealth. Iwould respond by saying that I do only what is needed to achieve my goals.And if in that process, I happen to extract a bit of unholy delight in thesuffering of a few innocent bystanders, in the lording of my power over theirweakness, then that is an added perk. Who's to say one cannot or should notbe afforded a few side benefits from a path of personal destiny that I deemto have been mine from birth? But I digress. At 1 AM on Thanksgiving Day, I was about to retire to my four-poster splendorin the Presidential Suite of the Brown Palace hotel in Denver when my faithfulvalet Esteven alerted me to the arrival of Mr. Palmer at the door of my suite.Ordinarily, I would have sent him away, but his appearance afforded me a chanceto accomplish what I had. Some 20 minutes later, a cop entered the bar and asked, "Who owns the dog tied under that tree outside... ?"Bruce called out, "It's mine, mate." Your dog seems to be in heat," the cop said.Bruce replied, "No way. She's cool as, 'cause she's tied up under that shade tree."The cop said, "No... ! You don't understand. Your dog needs to be bred." No way," said Bruce. "That dog don't need no bread. She ain't hungry 'cause I fed 'er this mornin'."The exasperated cop said, "NO! You idiot, you don't understand. Your dog wants to have sex... !"Bruce looked at the cop, then at his dog, and said, "Well, go ahead. I've always wanted a police dog..."There once was a man who owned a sausage factory, and he was showing his arrogant preppy son around his factory. Try as he might to impress his snobbish son, his son would just sneer. They approached the heart of the factory, where the father thought, "This should impress him!"He showed his son a machine and said, "Son, this is the heart of the.
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