... Mister..... Miss-" You can't tell, can you Doctor?" No." That's the problem. Neither can I." But which sex do you feel like?" I don't." A-HA!!" he exclaimed. Dug into my navel. Out popped a valve stem"JEE-SUS!!!" Relax, everybody has one. But it should have a cap on it. Yourgenderfluid's leaked out." My what?" Lie back..."He put a funnel into the stem. Took what resembled a gallon of cheapblueberry punch from a cabinet"Um..... could I try that pink kind there?"///////////////////////////////////////////#10 //////// THE QUEEROMETER NEVER LIES(Just a gay old drabble, circa 1998...)My new neighbor seemed nice enough, in a macho ignoramus kind of way. Hiscluttered apartmenthad porno mags scattered everywhere. He got us beers, turned on thetelevision"That dude's a goddamn faggot." That actor? You heard this?" I just know. I always know."I saw one serious flaw in his claim, but just nodded"And him too!" Gene Hackman? You sure?" Positive. 'Cause whenever I see a homo, I get this..... That's why we had both decided to go. Danny, neither of us know why but we both feel that you are the only one who can help us. Please, help." From what I overheard by chance your father is going to one of these parties in London on Friday and plans to take one of you. The following Tuesday a party will be held here. By then, Tuesday, I may find a way to help. None of you can be allowed to go Friday. That I can take care of. Is there a dish that you and your mother like but that your father will not eat?"She thought for a minute, then said, "Yes, okra." When you next see okra on the dinner table, all of us but your father must eat a portion. Do you understand?" Yes, I think so." One last thing. Would you or your mother miss having your father around if he should get into trouble with the law and be jailed for a long time?" No, we would not. We may have trouble making ends meet but it would be worth it?"I already had a tentative plan in mind and it could be furthered by getting in.
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