And on the other hand “ticks” are blood sucking creatures.This one is compliments of sbrooks103The Pope, Henry Kissinger and a Boy Scout are on a plane when they have to bail out, but there are only two parachutes.Kissinger says, “I’m the smartest person in the world. I must be saved,” grabs a pack and jumps.The Pope turns to the Boy Scout. “My son, I have lived a ling, full life. Take the other parachute and save yourself.”The Boy Scout just smiles. “Don’t worry, Your Holiness. The world’s smartest man just jumped out of the plane wearing my backpack!”The following items are compliments of J & B.After the brief Falkland Islands war, a British regiment commander was addressing some troops under his command who had heroically performed above and beyond the call of duty. He informed them that Her Majesty’s Army had committed to reward each of the three soldiers 100 pounds per inch of distance between two different parts of the man’s body.The commander addressed the first soldier,. The nervous anticipation in the room was palatable. I glanced at Natalie, and she seemed like a nervous wreck. I wondered how much was because of me, and what I supposedly represented, and how much was the fear my father’s little test had generated.“You know, Natalie, nothing really happened last night,” I said, hoping to convince myself as much as her. “So don’t expect too much.”“Yeah,” she replied. “That’s not what I heard. Shani said she went off like a skyrocket, despite you hardly doing anything to her, and Anh said she hasn’t been very active in years and thought she was past such things, but she just couldn’t help herself last night.”“How did she...”“Oh, Alex, do you really think a difference in language can keep girls from gossiping,” she answered with a laugh. “But Shani provided the translations for us.”I sighed in resignation, knowing there was no way to fight the effect my supposed aura had on these women as I turned and started removing my clothes and carefully putting.
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