Always thinking of Annette. There was so many questions. Was she coming on to me? Had she noticed my excitment? What would happen if I dared to make a move and let her know how i felt her? What would i do if she did? I couldn't stop thinking about it. I had to come up with an acceptable excuse to pay Annette a visit on a weekend. I did. Ann had cable. We didn't. I told my parents and Annette that everybody in school was talking about wrestling and the only way for me to sett it was by visiting Annettes new place.One friday evening i therefore found myself standing with a bag packed outside Annettes new appartment. She oppened the door and welcomed me in. She was looking totally ordinary. No sexy lingerie as far as the eye could see.It wasn't what I had hoped for and I started quickly to get cold feet about making a pass.I was way to nervous about the possible consequences. Annette said she had been making dinner for us and I could watch tv directly after, The appartment was really. ‘You know, being that way was always something weird or crazy.’ She had a point. Girls at our school who were gay were always shunned, or f***ed to live with their natural ambitions in agonizing silence. I had a few times wondered if Cindi was this way, but being so wrapped up in the day to day events of a teenager superseded those significant matters of the heart. I felt so bad for my dear friend… How did I ever not see this? Why didn’t I look for this, or better yet, why didn’t I follow up that night with another time where we both could express ourselves? I had to quit beating myself up. That was in the past, and there was nothing I could do about it. I had to deal with here and now, and my heart broken friend who still suffered from her unrequited love. I turned the conversation to a more hopeful one, which surprised even me. Here I was speaking of hope and the future, words that never once came from my mouth in the months proceeding today. We ended our talk that evening with.
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