I’ve never stolen anything from any of her temples or one of her high priests (that I’m aware of) but her beady eyes have been squinting at me lately with apparent disfavor! At these major roadside shrines, travelers tend to leave small gifts, usually food or flowers, or a small coin along with a very fervent and devout prayer. I try rather hard not to believe in the gods, largely so that they’ll choose in return not to believe in me, and more or less leave me entirely alone. It doesn’t seem to work that way however. I appear to amuse them for some reason. That early afternoon as I was making my final preparations for our night of community improvement via the aid of a jolly good fire, I had the sudden notion that I ought to be offering my own prayers to the nearby shrine, located right at the south end of the Ormsbridge. Refusing to bullied or intimidated, I acted with my usual contrariness and willfully instead pilfered a ripe apple that had been placed into the offertory bowl. Now. I also knewthat that wasn't the main issue, and that it had all evolved from thatone comment about my dick being small into a question of whether or not Ithought Abbie loved me. I wasn't entirely sure how it had got to thatstage, but apparently it had. Which was ridiculous - I knew Abbie lovedme. I hoped she still loved me after last night.If only I hadn't been so damn sensitive about my penis! I cursed myselfas I felt the warm water splash against my face. I mean, it was small. Iguess I always knew that I'd been on the smaller side of things, butafraid to admit it. No guy likes to think of himself has having a smallcock, but at the end of the day 50% of the world have to have a cocksmaller than average, right? That's what average meant, surely? Well,that depends whether they're using mean, median or mode, my brain chirpedin. Not helpful brain, I replied.I guess it was just that I never expected Abbie to say it was small. Ithink it was made worse by talking about it in relation to.
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