This was going to be awkward, how was I going to explain to her without using language that offended her. “Well,” I said, “they start a story, a couple meets she, unzips him, takes his you know what out and gives him a blow job, he undresses her and they have they sex and the story is over in a couple of paragraphs. No foreplay, no kissing, or affection. Just wham bang thank you ma-am sex.” I could see that she was blushing and I apologised to her. “Oh I'm sorry Hazel, I haven't known you long enough to talk like this, I hope I didn't embarrass you.” The redness on her face faded and she smiled. “No, Mike,” she said, “I agree with you. Sex should never be, wham bang, thank you ma-am. It should be slow and sensual with plenty of foreplay.” She blushed again then smiled and added. “Well that's how I like it anyway.” She went on to tell me that she spent a lot of time on her computer, playing games, surfing the web or writing emails, but she'd never thought to look for stories. “I'll. The locals were not impressed. There had been some fighting between the new village and the old.Vordon, their leader, had stopped the traders from coming here. Basically, he was trying to starve them into submission. Lee was not impressed. She asked where this Vordon was located. Two minutes later, Vordon woke to find a wand jammed under his chin.A very pissed off Lord Wizard and her apprentice a great hulking man were looking down on him. The man pissed his britches in fear. Lee told him in no uncertain terms if he persisted in victimising his neighbours, he would have to deal with her, did he understand? Vordon nodded that he did.Lee ran the wand over his forehead in a cross pattern. She said in a menacing voice that chilled his blood, “Every time you are nasty or try to force anyone do something against their wishes, this cross will burn. Do you understand?”He nodded ‘yes’ again. Then the wizards disappeared in front of his eyes. He went to hit his wife to get her out of bed and.
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