I became aware of a subtle rhythmic movement of her laptop and suddenly realised she was masturbating below the level of the table between us.Idly I picked through the pages before me but I couldn’t concentrate. I kept stealing glances at the girl opposite me. She seemed oblivious of the world around her and my glances became longer as I watched the expression on her face. Her eyes kept closing for long moment before flickering open to read more of whatever was on the screen in front of her. On a whim, I ‘accidentally’ dropped my pen on the floor and when I bent to pick it up I looked under the table. She seemed oblivious not only to my loss of a pen but also to my lengthy attempts to retrieve it.Below table level, I could see her naked legs with the skirt pulled up high. I could also see her hand busy between her legs. I grinned to myself as I straightened up. By this time her expression had changed. Her mouth hung open and she seemed to be gasping for air and her face assumed that. I stood unsteadily, feeling fluid running down my innerthighs, not knowing it was his sperm or my blood, buttoo afraid to look.The he said, ‘That’s rape, real rape. It’s what youwanted.’Nodding yes, I wanted it, I knew that and he knew itand his friends knew it. The pain and the violation,the cold and the rough dirty ground, the humiliation ofbeing almost naked in front of a group of guys while mybody was being used for the pleasure of my attacker andthere is nothing I can do to stop it. ***I wake up later. I’m at home. Tears well up, I rememberthe smell. Fear strikes deep into my soul.But it’s not real.On the couch with him, wrapped in a blanket him holdingme. ‘Was that enough?’ he is asking.‘More than enough,’ I reply, still shaking. Wonderingwhy I’d wanted it, what it was about me that made me dothings… things that no other girl would ever eventhink of… ‘It was only a fantasy,’ he.
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