I want to be naked and feel them cum on me, like those women on the beach yesterday, or the porn I watched last night, yes if you must know I 'Jilled one off' at two in the morning, girls do get horny you know.My knee is touching the guy next to me, good he is not pulling away, shame he has to wear trousers, bare flesh touching is electric, fuck my legs are wider, I am indecent.I get up and move into a group of men, and immediately I can feel them rub against me. Thin skirts and no underwear will soon make them aware of my curves. I love taking this commuter at this time in the morning, I always get groped, that's why I dont wear panties, they touch and I give them something to touch in return, and at journeys end, the station toilet beckons, and yes, such is my heightened state of feverish need, I have gone into the 'Gents' section, and whacked out a good Jilling, while men sat either side, not knowing whats going on in the next cubical. How emboldened am I, very, I once walked out. Cheap alcohol, cheap pills and loud music. People got drunk, high, made out, made fools of themselves, all just for the sake of doing it. I couldn’t stand it. Why couldn’t I? Why couldn’t I be like them; drown the cynicism and act like a regular person rather than a judgemental spectator?Back outside, the night was cold. I tried to act like I had something to do. I looked at Lance’s phone number, scrawled down in his beautiful writing. Could I? He’d said I could. I started dialling, and then stopped. I hovered outside a pub, the light from inside glowing warm. The wind whipped my hair back. I looked down at the number again. I wasn’t wearing a jacket and the dress I’d worn to the party was short and sleeveless, the sequinned hem ending well above my knees.I called him. It seemed to ring forever but when he answered, his voice felt like the most precious thing in the world.“Hi,” I said.“Taylor? Hey. What’s up?”“Uh…” Maybe it’d been a mistake. I fought for something to say..
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