I had to do something, that’s when my friend’s idea came to my mind, to do it with some prostitute, it was not the best thing to do, but looking at my condition, I thought it may help.After some serious thinking, I decided I should maybe take the risk and do it with some prostitute for money. I called up my friend and told him I was ready to do it, at first he was surprised and started making fun of me that why you want to do it now, but after some time, he agreed to help me, and we started discussing the options and settled with some prostitute he knew and described to me as one of the best prostitutes available at that time in our locality.I asked him to arrange the session as soon as possible, he did accordingly, and fixed the date, time and price. It was fixed at the next day, I was happy but at the same time I was a little scared, I don’t know why but I was. I once thought to cancel it but my friend refused to cancel it. That meant I had to go and do it, there was no other. Some asked me if I was having an affair with Renaud as my attention seemed to be always on him. Of course, I couldn’t answer truthfully as that would have ruined everything I was striving for, but this denial gave rise to another problem. If he wasn’t mine then he was free to talk to whoever he pleased – I grew jealous of the attention he gave to others, especially other women. Jealousy was something I would learn to control eventually but in that moment, it consumed me.Meanwhile, my relationship with my boyfriend, Panek, had taken an interesting turn. Although things between us were becoming more and more difficult, we still had sex with each other. One reason for my continuing to fuck him was my growing jealousy of those who were taking Renaud’s attention away from me. My childish tantrum resulted in me trying to make Renaud envious of me – a move that failed miserably. Even flirting openly with other men failed to raise an eyebrow from Renaud.It was a curious contradiction – I had.
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