I’ve got thick skin, I can takeit.” He continued to sit in silence. “Chad. If youdon’t tell me what is bothering you than I’m justgonna think you don’t like me. It’s gonna ruin theholidays for me if I think my nephew hates me.”“It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s actually thecomplete opposite.” Chad felt that he crossed the linehe didn’t want to cross as he finished that sentence.His face was suddenly beat red.“Wait…” She said with a shocked look on her face.“Oh god. So the reason you have been acting so weirdis because…” Her brain was connecting the dots.“Chad…are you in love with me?” He quietly shook hishead up and down. “Oh my…” She was trying to figureout what to say. “When did you start feeling likethis? Was it when I was in my undies last night?”“No, I have been attracted since the second you. ..inside me. I need a man to help her come out. I was hoping your father would be here to do it...I mean, that is what marriage is supposed to be, isn't it? Marriage means you stay with your man, even if he has problems getting excited, and even if his maximum is 3 lousy inches. Marriage means you are loyal and stay." [At this point, I was slowly backing away as mom slowly approached. She won. Her hands started to caress my upper body, which was overdeveloped due to a cheap gym membership.]Mom: "God, Pete, I never noticed that you are so different from your daddy. What muscles. Oh, looky there, in your shorts. That thing is gigantic. What a man! I think that little Pete wants mommy, doesn't he?"Me: "Mom, the job of the man of the house is to make the babies, and the man of the house is dad; he was just called away on an emergency. I am going to turn around and do these dishes and I expect you to be back upstairs when I turn back." [I turned on the hot water and grabbed the Ivory.
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