Now, however, I suddenly began worrying that all this was too good to be true, that I was deluding myself, that somehow everyone had colluded to play a giant prank on me and I was the only one who wasn't aware. Or maybe it was all just a dream? Basically, I couldn't believe that I had ever managed to get someone as beautiful as the woman in white now walking down the aisle towards me to ever love me.As she drew closer, the feeling of dread grew. Why was she so immaculate? Why was she so clean? There was not a spot on her, not a single fleck of semen, not a hair out of place -- at least, as far as I could tell, since her head was hidden under a shroud. A fucking shroud?? What was this, the sixteenth century? Who wears a shroud to a wedding? And why was no-one getting up to use her? Why was she allowed to walk towards the altar completely unspoiled? It wasn't respect for the sanctity of marriage -- there was fucking going on in the audience and the minister himself had only just. She’d been pounding vodka with nothing to eat all day and was already 2 sheets to the wind. We had lost touch for a few years so we were looking forward to getting caught up. What I wasn’t aware of was that in her unhappy marriage, she had taken comfort in food, a lot of food. She was no longer the tiny 120 lb girl I wanted so badly to fuck all those years ago, she was now easily 200 lbs and wasn’t wearing the weight well at all much to my dismay. Regardless of this, we all got along well and chatted and drank for hours with Erin also getting very drunk. Finally it was time for Kat, her hubby and her k**s to head out and we all said our good-byes and they left. Not 5 minutes later there was a knock at the door. It was Kat’s hubby. He asked us to follow him to his truck. There in our driveway, passed out in the passenger seat was Kat, covered in vomit. They hadn’t made it to the end of the block before she wretched out what little she had in her stomach. I helped him remove her from.
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