I looked across at my wife who was shaking her head sadly but she didn't speak.Pam noticed the silence in an instant."What's wrong?" she asked hurriedly. "Did she do something wrong? Did she pick out the wrong guy?"Elizabeth glanced at me and shrugged."She picked out the wrong guy, all right," I said. "The guy your idiot of an ex-husband is doing business with is one of the most notorious drug dealers in this area. He's been arrested, what Elizabeth, maybe 30 times. He's only been convicted once – on a misdemeanor possession charge – because witnesses disappear and informants wind up dead."How does a half-assed moron like Biff Wells get involved with a big-time drug dealer?" I asked no one in particular.No one was exactly who answered, too.I hoped to God I could find Biff and force the truth out of him before I fed him to the alligators.Pam agreed to disagree – with everyone – about the living arrangements. She was barely making do on her teacher's aide salary but she couldn't justify. He promises to come back to reality, get his head screwed on straight again, suck it up. He does ok for a while but then the numbness starts to wear him down and he lets himself drift. This week is particularly crappy – it’s his birthday. At this time last year he could be with her everyday. If not in person, over Skype. If not over Skype, then in notes and recordings he made to know she was smiling because of him. If not in writing, then he could remember her smell and taste and hear her laugh in his head when he went to sleep at night. Those memories are starting to fade, it might make more sense to let them go but he knows he would rather hold on to them for as long as possible, maybe forever. Hell, some days it feels like it never even happened. He pulls in to get the mail – sorting over the trash he tosses the flyers, tucks the bills under his arm, and glances down at the last envelope. It’s handwritten. What the hell? No one writes letters anymore – maybe it’s from an old.
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