I knew mine," I said as we went up the stairs slowly. "I just don't like talking about it." What do you like?" Ronald asked me when we got to the top."School," I shrugged. "The bathroom's down there, end of the hall. The pills and needles in the medicine cabinet are mine. You're not like a junkie or anything, are you?" No," he shook his head."Anyway, don't touch that stuff," I told him. "And the red toothbrush is mine too." I got a blue one," Ronald offered me a little smile and I ignored it."This is my room. That one's Dana's, you'll meet her, don't worry," I told him. "And I guess this one is yours." Okay." He poked his head inside the bedroom as I stood in the hallway."You gotta keep it clean yourself. There's no maids or anything and Renee will get mad if you don't," I said. "She's nice, but kinda strict about that stuff." Sure, okay," he shrugged."How old are you?" I asked him."Almost twenty." I knew it," I smiled then, just because it was hard being mean all the time. "I'll see. There is no such thing as a fat Barbie either. I've never seen a Barbie who is short, like us, or one who has a shaped nose, like your sister. As far as I know, there is only one kind of Barbie. She always looks like this." ( Later, Barbie developed many sizes and identities, but this was around 1960.) It took a week or before I completely absorbed the idea that Barbie wasn’t ever going to look like me or Rachel or my mom or anybody I ever knew. My attitude toward her changed. Rachel (my sister) and I regularly tortured and defiled Barbie, pulling off her legs and arms, and burning her breasts with wooden matches. We cut her long legs down so she would move the way that Rachel and I did. It wasn’t very long after that that I began to form some ideas about sex. Like any k**s, Rachel and I had Barbie's panties off as fast as we could discreetly do that maneuver. To our shock, Barbie had nothing "down there" at all, just a blank, bare nothing where her pussy cleft should be. Except for.
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