Laura took me over to the electric razors. They had a few rechargeable shavers on display. She took out one of them."I've been in this department for a few years, so I know which shavers work the best. I think this one might be perfect for what you're needing", she said.Now I know McDowell's employees were supposed to be very helpful and customer focused. But what happened next I had never seen in McDowell's. Laura took the razor off the charger and started shaving my beard. She picked up a mirror to show me how well the shaver worked."See why I think this will work?"I saw that the beard was shaved quite smoothly. "Wow! Very nice and smooth!" Laura shaved my moustache, too. Like my chin, my upper lip was quite smooth and hairless. She noticed some chest hairs."Now, this razor comes with some special attachments." Special attachments? What's so special about them?"As I'm standing here telling you this story, I kind of wished I hadn't asked that question. Laura unbuttoned my shirt right. ‘Glub glub.’ ‘Fuck off,’ she laughed. That night I dreamed about Ruth. I had just built a bookshelf for my den, and spent most of the evening organizing my books. Steinbeck. Salinger. No, Salinger comes before. Tartt. Hemingway. Some obscure books on Taoism. At first I dreamed about pages. The letters blurred, forming a braille. Braille swirls. Then the designs flew off the pages. When they hit the air, they became suspended, lightly floated in front of my face. I pushed them back with my hand. They caught, and I pushed harder. ‘Blow,’ I heard Ruth whisper and I blew the patterns away, revealing her. She was sitting with her legs spread wide, and in her hands she had a knife. ‘What are you doing?’ ‘Sacrifice me, baby.’ Baby? Fuck. I woke up sweating. That was not the type of dream guys wish for, let me tell you. Like, if that were a lucid dream, Ruth would be holding… Fuck. I told myself I gotta stop this. I pulled myself out of bed and turned on the lights to my aquarium. The.
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