“I made your coffee black,” I noted as I prepared to begin negotiations. “I’m thinking a million dollars will be about right. In return, I won’t sue you for alienation of affections, failure to adhere to your no fraternization policy, sexual harassment, and assault with a friendly weapon.”“Can you explain where or when you and I came to any agreement about my interactions with Sue?” asked the dumb bastard.“Obviously, you and I never agreed to shit, Asshole. Your company has rules in effect regarding fraternization,” I replied patiently. “Sue works for you, so you violated the rules of your own company. You just fraternized the living hell right out of her. You owe me!”“I don’t follow your logic,” insisted the dumb fuck. “If you and I have no agreement of any kind, how can you possible take me to court over not following my company rules? You are not involved with my company.”“Everybody knows I can sue you for screwing Sue!” I practically screamed at the ignorant bastard. “That’s how. It all seemed kind of strange. She's in her twenties and I'm sixty. Sure, I keep in good shape, not a muscle man but my weight is just about textbook perfect and I maintain good enough muscle tone for good health. Maybe she has a thing for older men? In any case, I was definitely attracted to her and I think she felt the same about me. I decided to find out. Now it's Friday, and she just stopped by to say hello. She was wearing a top that showed just enough cleavage to show off, but not so much that it would be out of place at work. More than usual for her, though. Stirrings in my pants.My cube mate is at a meeting, this is my chance. After hello and the usual topics (her cat, my old car's repair bills...), I asked if she wanted to get a drink after work."Hey, that sounds like a good idea, Bill!" She was beaming her best smile.I suggested a restaurant bar, and added, "We can grab some chow there too. At 5:30?" Great, see you then." She left to start her workday and I.
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