The train arrived and I clambered aboard, put my small amount of luggage onto the overhead rack, asked the person occupying the seat that I had booked if I could please have it. They moved, no troubles. The seat next to me should have been occupied, but the owner hadn’t shown up. For some reason this time, I didn’t want to get out the phone that has all my music on it, unusual because I like to try and hide the noise of the trains and escape into my own world. I settled into my seat and started to take in the carriage around me. Behind me, a sleeping woman, in front, a young pregnant woman, opposite her, an old man, behind him, a few noisy twenty-somethings. The other side of the carriage next to them, a young man, behind him, a young couple clearly in love from looking at their faces, then, beside me, a young uni student and an old woman. Doing this would be difficult, but I’d manage to somehow. I put my laptop on the empty seat beside me and took off my jacket, a denim one and so. Danny keeps pushing for more, and I keep stalling. Finally he says he’s going to come up to meet “this Hugo Smith of yours.”“No!” I say sharply. Maybe too sharply, I realize belatedly, but too late now, it’s out. I try to soften it. “Danny, don’t come. Please. Give us a little time together first, OK? I promise you’ll meet him, you’re all the family I’ve got left and I’m not going to shut you out, but this is private time for now. Our time, OK?”At last he backs off. We talk a bit more, and I promise to call again in a week or so, and I’m done at last.Hugo’s simply been sitting all the time I’ve been on the phone. I told him what it is before I started, that it lets me talk to people far away, He took it the way he’s taken everything here, simple acceptance. How does he do it? I know I couldn’t.Well, maybe today we’ll find out how far acceptance goes. I’m going shopping, and I’m taking him with me; I’m not sure how much trouble he might get into here if I left him, and besides he needs.
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