."After the drive- during which I catch Laura's mother up on events andreceive, as Laura promised, her unconditional support if I want to comeout again- I arrive home feeling refreshed, as though a weight has beenlifted from my shoulders.One of the things that hurt the most about the disaster that was myfirst coming out was the way I ostracised myself from the girls, whoare easily some of the best friends I've ever had. If I'd only tried toexplain myself to them rather than pushed them away in anger, Iwouldn't have spent the last three months feeling miserable- anotherthing for which I can thank the testosterone poisoning my body. Knowingthat I can talk to the girls whenever I want is a great relief- even ifit'll be a long time before I'm ready to talk to my dad again.Before I've even had a chance to say hello to dad and my sisters, Ihead straight up to my bedroom, grabbing my tablet computer and openingup Facebook, where I unblock all six girls and send them friendrequests. Laura,. She was sure he wouldn’t leave her boredand frustrated. The silly thing was that he had hit on her several timesin a half-hearted kind of way without realising howtempted she had been and how it had only been teenageinsecurity that had prevented her from responding. Buthow could he know that if he pushed just that little bitmore his flirting would have paid off? She swore toherself that one day he would make light-heartedadvances once again and she would surprise him by saying‘yes’. Then one afternoon, when these thoughts were still freshin her mind, he called to her over the dividing fence. ‘Joan’s going out tonight, I wondered if you fanciedcoming round and keeping me company?’ It wasn’t the most imaginative of chat-up lines and itcaught her by surprise, and so at first sheautomatically shrugged his approach off, giving him theusual disdainful roll of her eyes and turning her back.But then, even as she turned away, she was thinking.
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