’ General laughter ensues. ‘Yeah.’ I reply nodding my head. The pretty girl he has by the waist smiles at me. This girl has a soul smile. It’s an open welcoming smile. When I’ve fallen into darkness, a woman with a soul smile can reach in after me and pull me out into the warm light. It’s like she embraces my soul from afar, lifting me. I want to smile back at her, I appreciate her reaching out to me, but I can’t. I think my turmoil appears on my face because her smile falls. I’ve pulled her down here with me. She asks worriedly, ‘Are you alright?’ ‘Yes, I’m fine.’ I answer striding past. I’m a loner. Would someone else seek solace in her warm concern? I sense they stop and watch my back for a moment. I hear comments and giggling. They turn and continue their leisurely walk. The wind has blown sand onto my clothing, I don’t bother putting them on. I pull them out of the sand and shake them off. Looking back at the ocean, I speak to Mother, ‘Scars connecting me and Emily.’ I laugh. And he usually finds these things out. I took a deep breathe, "I missed the sign for 35 mph and the cop pegged me at that corner where they like to hide." Right - but you usually drop your speed off a mile before that sign because of that cop. What was different about today? Were you on your phone?"I could barely look at him as I whispered "Yes." I had broken the phone rule. Conversations while driving were only for utilitarian purposes. I was lost, a road was closed and I needed new directions. Any lengthy conversations were prohibited because they were a distraction and a threat to my safety.I met his gaze and he looked so disappointed. "You realize what this means right? That fine will have to come from our vacation budget which may mean we won't be traveling this summer. That the cause of this was distraction, and you could've hurt someone or taken their life including your own. You will require swift and serious consequences for this. Remove your clothing."I gasped. Complete.
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