"You went all the way didn't you?" I...guess," I said. "It's...a compulsion, I've always been like this." Always? When we were dating? When we got married? Tell me the truth.Did you wear my wedding dress."I hung my head, I nodded slightly."Christ. How many men have you been with." One" I said. "Clark Spencer. In high school." This was a gamble. Inever had sex with Clark. But I didn't think anyone would confrontClark and ask him."My God. You've sucked a dick! A real one! Was it big?" I couldn't help it. He threatened to tell everyone that I woredresses. And I guess it was average-sized."She looked at me. She looked at her sister."Are you and Luke Williams a thing? I know a lot of guys in Hollywoodare gay. Is Luke? Did you kiss his dick, too?" What? No." But you've tried, haven't you? You made a pass at him." Not really. I mean, when I was Angel in Rent, he said he thought I waspretty. But we just made out a little. That's all." The making out bitwas a lie, too, intended to embellish. 'A man is recovering from surgery when the Surgical Nurse appears and asks him how he is feeling.'I'm O. K. But I didn't like the four letter-words the doctor used in surgery, ' he answered.'What did he say, ' asked the nurse.'Oops!'While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband's advice.'What do you think?' I asked. 'Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?''Better get a bikini, ' he replied. 'You'd never get it all in one.'He's still in intensive care.The graveside service just barely finished, when there was massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance.The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well, she's there.'This one is compliments of Gary:3 HillbilliesThree Hillbillies are sittin' on a porch shootin' the bull.1st.
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