The doctor went on to explain the injuries to Lori.Kyle interrupted the doctor before he’d finished. “Can we see Lori? Can I see my wife?”“Somebody will come to get you when she is out of recovery.”When the doctor left, Kyle broke down, and Maddy held him.“I’ve been such a fool. I was devastated by what she did, but I should have just gotten the fuck over myself. I should have at least let her explain herself like she wanted. If I lose her, I don’t know what I’m going to do.”“At long last, you’ve woken up to yourself. And it’s not too late. We will nurse her back to health. We’ll do it together. You won’t be alone in this.”It was a couple of weeks before Lori was out of the hospital. Kyle had moved back home and made alterations for wheelchair access and other aids. He set up the master bedroom for Lori and the guests’ room for himself. When Lori came home, Maddy also moved into the other spare room to help Kyle look after her. At first, they had to do absolutely everything for her.. I hate to play the ‘what if’ game, but at this point I cannot avoid it any longer. What if we were closer? Why do I even tease myself with those thoughts? Why do we tease ourselves with those thoughts. It’s almost like torture, the way I ache for you. Why are we subjecting ourselves to this. Should we just agree to be friends and walk away, only talking every once in a while? Can I survive without air? NO! As smart as that would be, I do not believe I am capable of going through with it. You have become a valuable part of my life. I feel like I have this illness, and the only cure is you, and your presence. My heart aches when I wait to hear from you. I cannot imagine what a day without talking to you would be like. God. God! Why? If only these stupid tears could do something useful. I want you here, next to me, with me. I want to share everything I can with you, not just limit it to conversations. Oh, but those conversations. We would be nowhere without them. You have figured me.
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