.. I mean, I'm flattered but you know we can't..."Zack - "I'm not talking in a serious way, I don't want anything to change but... I find I have been thinking about you more and more, all of you. And I..."Me - "But... you do remember I am..."Zack - "Yes. And it doesn't change anything. I still want you, if only once."Me - "Zack... I don't know what..."We sat there, the tension making seconds feel like hours. The next action, the next uttered word, would decide how everything changes from this moment onwards. I played out every scenario in my head, every sordid action and it's eventual consequences. What I wanted, what he wanted, everything would hinge on what I said next.Me - "This needs to stay between us."Zack - "... yes."Me - "It can only happen this one time. Julie must never find out, no-one can."Zack - "Absolutely."Me - "If there is anything you are hesitant about then you are the one in control, I am not going to make you do anything that you don't want to."Zack - "I. Nothing a cup or two of coffee won't fix, I assured myself, but that didn't change anything. Marie's packing was as lively and noisy as she was. She wasn't done when the doorbell rang at nine. Her shy and apologetic boyfriend joined me for coffee in the kitchen and I offered him some of my homemade carrot cake. "You look tired. She kept you up all night, didn't she?" "I was out late last night. You know what that means. She hasn't had the chance to talk to anyone." The boy let out a small sigh and smiled "Your sister won't let me finish a word for the first couple of hours." I smiled back and finished my cup of coffee watching Marie look for her passport. At half past nine I finally waved the blue Fiat goodbye. It was almost possible to hear Marie's voice still echoing from the walls. My younger sister had been staying with me for eight months and was as much a part of the place as the paintings on the walls or the big white sofa in the living room. If any of them was gone for a day.
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