... 30 more minutes pass. How wasted were we? completely wasted. The thing about me is, I can be drunk as hell, yet I remember every detail of the night. The next day it will be crystal clear, and nothing about the prior night will be fuzzy. This worked to my advantage, because what would happen next would be something I would think about often. We both lay on Abby's bed, weighed down by the amount of alcohol we had consumed. My head hit her soft pillow, my jaw was slightly open. She lay close to me..just close enough to touch. I giggled to myself. Abby was making unintelligible remarks. "ahhh.", she whispered softly. My eyes truly saw her for the first time. She was vulnerable, her dark brown hair lay over her brown eyes. Her tanned skin shone with the night's mist. A silk shirt she was wearing was slightly pulled down, and I began to see the outline of a red bra. I had always been jealous of her huge boobs, but now, I was suddenly admiring them. Her eyes were closed, resting, and. "Does it look weird?"She let her coat slip down her arms to the floor so that it formed a pile against her ankles, and she kept her arms straight down by her sides, as though fighting a desire to cover up. Her legs were close together. Her head was bowed a little. She wasn't looking directly at me. I think she couldn't. Again, I knew what she was thinking. What if I rejected the offer? Could I accept it?She must have stood something like that in front of her mirror, looking at her body, certain she'd never actually be able to show herself to me, or even to Al. Her desperation must have been terrible. Nothing in her life had prepared her for such a step, but her need would have kept the thought there, the idea of being transported by sex. Did she lie in bed at night thinking about it, thinking she couldn't die without experiencing it? She must have hated how she looked.The hate was misplaced. She was thin and marvelously pale. Were both from the chemo? I could see her ribs and the.
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