I was not in the right frame of mind, and it basically pissed me off. I guess it felt like here I was trying to be little-miss hot-shit mentor (because Im the ancient 25 year old here), and the whole time all hes thinking about is getting in my pants?! Anyway I kind of lost my shit at him. I was like for real femboi? I didnt even think you liked girls. You know Im a girl right? Because I mean jesus christ, youre fucking prettier than I am. Anyway yeah, I said a bunch of stuff, and then told him go fuck yourself because you aint fuckin this until you grow some pubic hair and also a fucking pair of nuts kid. Anyway hes CRUSHED. I mean it was as if his entire reproductive future was at stake and I just shut him the fuck down. Like every baby he ever imagined fathering I had just stabbed in the face or something. Anyway I felt bad like right then, at that moment, and I told him to take 5 so he could go hug himself and cry in the bathroom or whatever, and I figured while he was doing that. More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;"Now, DASHER! now, DANCER! now, PRANCER and VIXEN!On, COMET! on CUPID! on, DONNER and BLITZEN!To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roofThe prancing and pawing of each little hoof.As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;A bundle of sex toys he had flung on his back,And he looked like a peddler with a really big pack!His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!His ass cheeks like roses, his dickhead like a cherry!His droll little mouth.
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